Saturday, October 28, 2006

R.I.P. Confusa Multiple Tiffanitias!

Sad News...

My doggie of 15 years died 4 months ago...
Her name was Tiffany. She was a cute lil golden brown dacshund, the light of our lives.
She was old, sick, but comfortable. Although I knew that there will be one day when she would have to go, I could never bring myself to accept it, and still have not.

She died when I was here in Ahmedabad, when I could not even wish her goodbye, when I could not see her one last time; in my mother's lap. Everyone back at home is quite grief stricken. I cried the day mum told me. But I'm over it. But I know, I'm not quite over it. I'm ok right now, cuz I'm here. But I know the moment I set foot at home, I will burst out crying, cuz there will be no brown lil thing running towards me, barking, jumping, trying to lick my face, wagging her tail @ 10 wags/sec! There will be no sad eyes looking at me when I leave home. There will be no innocents looks at me while I enjoy her favourite sweet. There will be no one staring at me questioningly when I'm trying to trouble her. There will be no one responding to my calls. There will be no one running to go fetch my slippers, or the ball I just threw. There will be no one on my lap when we go out for a drive. There will be no barking when the bell rings. There will be no snoring beside me on my bed at night. There will be no Tiffany ever... again!

While this thought saddens me to no end, I try to think of the happier times that we had with her! Tiffany, the doggie with a million names, every one had a different name with which they called her. So many names, so many poems made for her... Tifi, tifu, chipi, chimpu, chima, tipu, chipu, timpukdini, champakali, cheepnee, tipni, futti, chunni, cheefee...!!!!

We called her confusa multiple Tiffanitias: confusa because we are still confused what kind of weird creature she was, multiple cuz she portrayed multiple animal characteristics (she was timid like a mouse, jumped around like a rabbit, was fat like a buffalo/elephant, etc) and ofcourse, Tiffanitias was her Species Name!! I know its crazy, but thats how she was, and we were, when we were around her.

I miss her, still. And always will. After all, even human beings are not capable of the unconditional love that she showed me. Even if I slapped her a minute ago for doing something stupid, she would come running with the same enthusiasm and love when I would come back home that evening, that she would have had, had I not scolded her. I could vent my anger on her, say anything and everything to her, without the fear of being judged. She meant so much to us, that none of us would eat, sleep or do anoything without her. So much that if ever a calaity struck, even before I would grab food/water/money or look for family, I would look for her. So much that even if my mom had just one roti to eat, she would first give a part of it to Tiffany, and then to us. She was the baby of the family. She was a part of everything in our lives. She went with us for vacations, car drives when we went for icecream, to our relatives' houses when we went for dinner. She was an active part of every festival we celebrated: she got the tikka and sacred thread on her wrist on Dussehra and Diwali; we coloured her wild on Holi. She sould sit patiently through all poojas, except when I made rangoli: then she would roam about happily in that room, wagging her tail, ruining my colour work!! We even tried to make her into a quintessential Indian Doggie... by draping her with a duppatta for a sari, complete with earrings and makeup!

She was great fun outside home too... When she was a young doggie, she was known to be a fast runner. The moment someone would open the front door, she would run out, and it would take 10 of us kids and 20 minutes for us to locate and catch her!! What a devil she was! Not only that, she was quite a dish when in her ol days... there were countless dogs who were crazy about her, but the lady she was, she never gave any Bhaav to anyone. Sure she had friends, but her heart beat for only one: Raph, our neighbour's Golden Labrador. So what if they were different breeds, so what if she was 1/10th the size of her lover, they were crazy about each other. Every chnce she got, she ran out and right into their house, and rush to meet her love. A pity they could not consummate their love. Apart from her lover, she had a lot of friends, like Beetle and Sugar amongst others, and she spent days and night froliking about with them! They were best buddies, totally inseparable! Such was their bond, that they all celebrated and attended eeach other's birthdays. Ah! Birthdays! Another fun day for her. We would get a cake, nad arrange for lots of fun non-veg food , and invite all the dogs of the campus. Ad they, like good friends, would never come without a gift for her: a ball, a bowl, a collar/leash, a chewtoy, food etc.

We had lots of fun during the rains too. Funny, she hated having a bath like every other canine, but she loved the rains. She loved running out, getting dirty, and jumping around. There were areas where water collected, and we used to put her in a tub, and she used to happily float away in her makeshift boat! Yes, life after that was not so much fun, when she would enter the house and dirty everything she touched! Then both she and us kids got the scolding of our lies from our parents. But we never learnt, and repeated the whole thing the next day!

Towards the end of her life, she was old, lazy but comfortable, and thankfully not diseased or in pain. She just died of old age: she gave up eating, and after a few revivals, she finally gave up on July 5th 2006. She died a virgin: we never could get her to mate with any dog. Was she a lady, or plain stupid, we are not so sure. But whatever she was, she was a darling, and we all miss her presence in our lives. Nothing is the same without her, and can never be. In a month, we are getting a new doggie, but no one will ever be able to take her place in our lives and hearts!

Tiffany, we love you and miss you and always will!
So long, Farewell. Adieu my friend! Adios Amigo! Hasta La Vista Baby!

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

The Show Will Go On...

Bloodshot eyes
Dark and gloomy skies
No day, no night
Only she is in sight

No present, no future
He only knows the past
Disappointed yet optimistic, says he
"Nice guys finish last"

He loved her, but did she?
'She loved me... she loved me not..'
Plucking petals of a flower?
More like pices of his heart!

Those magical nights
And the mornings after
The high, higher than cannabis,
The hearts beating faster...

The sweetest coffee - the one they shared
The dinners where they hardly ate
Sneaking in for a midnight rendezvous...
These meant much more than just a date.

They knew they were different
But still it felt just right
They knew it was almost impossible
But the romantics, they always saw light

But like they say, all good things end
And end they did, but maybe only for one
For the other there was hope, even across borders
but little did he know, that she had none.

One day, then two, a week, then a few
He waited for her by day and by night
For her, he was no more; but he still felt her
In the breeze, the music, the moonlight!

He now sits here, still
wasted, withering away
But he refuses to give up
Till he hears her say

"I Love You"
And then he will be reborn
But until then, the curtains wont fall
The show will go on!