Wednesday, December 07, 2005


One night, after finishing with my studies, I decided to go to sleep. But since I’m suffering from some kind of insomnia these days, I wasn’t particularly sleepy, and decided to finish watching a movie I was watching last week: Philadelphia.

Its an old movie starring Tom Hanks, and for those who don’t know about it, its about a man called Andrew Becket who is a brilliant lawyer with a great future until his law firm discovers he is gay and is suffering from AIDS, and they fire him, although on the pretext that he was incompetent (which they proved by deliberately jeopardising his work). So he decides to go to the court for wrongful termination. After a long and painful court battle, he emerges victorious, and is awarded around 5 million dollars by the jury. However, he is unable to enjoy any of it, cuz he dies soon after.

After I finished watching the movie, which by the way is extremely well made with excellent performances by Denzel Washington and Tom Hanks (a must watch for all those who haven’t seen it yet), I thought about the underlying message in the movie: about the general attitude of people towards homosexuals and AIDS, which could range from strong hatred and disapproval to apathy, to sympathy to.. And who knows… Even empathy.

But there rose a number of questions and concerns in my mind.

Some of us, including myself, feel that there is nothing wrong in being gay, and that it’s ok to hang around with a person suffering from AIDS. We are educated people who know that no way will hanging out with anyone with AIDS will infect us. Or being friends with homosexuals will change our orientation. We can easily say that we are very sensitive and tolerant etc etc. (as long as no one around us is in that position)

However, I wonder, how many of us have actually come across and personally known a gay/AIDS patient?If we were to meet one, are we sure we would not flinch when he shakes hand with us? Or when we have stay with him, eat with him etc.? Would we accept him as easily as we accept other friends? Just cuz he has AIDS?

And what about homosexuality... would the guys be ok with hanging around such a guy? Or would they fear being branded a gay themselves if they hang around one? Would they really make friends with him, have the minimum physical contact with him? Or would they be afraid he may try to take advantage?

Would we accept that our children are gay, happily???? Would we allow them to choose their sexual orientation? How would we react if we come to know tomorrow that our best friend is actually gay? And he wants to "stay with/marry" his partner? Would we still continue the same relation?Would we really?? (Everywhere one can substitute his with her and gay with lesbian)

I'm not even going into the Indian Penal code which says that homosexuality is a CRIME. There are still many many countries in this world where homosexuality is a taboo and gay marriages are banned. But the awareness and tolerance is rising slowly. However as far as individual acceptance and tolerance is concerned, I'm not sure.

If you ask me, I do not have an answer to these questions. Cuz the fact of the matter is I have never had a very near and dear one suffering from AIDS nor have I ever personally known, seen, talked to a homosexual person. So I don’t know how I would react if someone very close to me was gay and/or had AIDS.

But I do know that we all are glad no one like that is around us. We make fun of gays, we term every pansy looking guy a gay, and we find it difficult to accept 2 guys holding hands. I don’t know what it says about us. Are we tolerant? Or we pretend to be? Can we really tolerate? Or will this expected tolerance fail when we are faced with such a person in reality?

I don’t know. Do u?

A Movie of its kind....(sensitivity disclaimers..!!)

Just this weekend, i was chilling around with some of my classmates.
One turned up late, saying that he was busy watching an EPIC movie.
When he told which movie it was, everyone (3 guys) except me started laughing,
and i had no clue what teh big deal was!
And then one of them suggested: "Why dont we show Fidoe what an epic movie it is!"
And then began the search for the most poetic and ultimate Mithunda movie: GUNDA!!!

We went to DC++, LAN etc... downloaded part 1, and since we could not wait, we
downloaded the right software to watch it while it was being downloaded.
I was advised to watch only the first 20 mins of the movie.... when it is D- grade,
rest of the movie its C grade.

So i began my journey into the world of GUNDA, and what a world it was!!
Every single guy I saw, I had seen before in previous, good, decent, perfectly
respectable movies.....
And here they were, in this stupid movie, in stupid locales and situations,
doing stupid things, acting stupidly, mouthing ridiculous (and sometimes
downright OBSCENE) dialogues.....
but it was worth it, the peotic, rhyming dialogues, kinds of which would put
Keats, Shakespeare, Wordsworth to shame!!!!
Every moment of the first 20 mins was a laugh riot!!

Every character had an entry dialogue.....

"Mera naam hai bulla, main rakhta hoon khulla.."
now, he keeps WHAT khulla, i dunno!! ;))

"mera naam hai chutiya (as in the hindi word for ponytail, not teh abuse), main
khadi karta hoon sabki khatiya"

"naam hai mera ibu hatela, maa meri chudail ki beti, baap mera shaitan ka chela...khayega kela??"

"mera naam hai potey, jo apne baap ke bhi nahin hotey"

Then there are some stupid dialogues like...
"oye neta, kaam ki baat bata, jiske liye tu dilli se billi ka doodh peekar aaya hai!!"

when bulla's sis is murdered, the senti speech of her bro:
"munni, meri behen munni, to tu mar gayi? lambu aata ne tujhe lamba kar diya?
maachis ki tilli ko khamba kar diya? maine tere liye 300 ladke dekhe the..
lekin tu to katela gurda, yani murda ho gayi??

So bulla kills lambu aata to take revenge, and another character tells him...
"bulla toone khullam khulla lambu aata ko maut ke tave par senk diya, uski
laash ko worli ke gutter mein phenk diya!"

When mithun gets the villain arrested, the villain says this on his way to jail...
"tujhe banake maut ke mooh ka nivala... tere seene mein gaad dunga maut ka bhala!!"

Potey is threatening mithun:
"zyada badbad karke apni zindagi mein gadbad mat kar!"

But i think the best dialogue award goes to (pardon me for using the language...)

"Gangwar shuru ho gaya hai... ab laashen aise tapkengi, jaise chhote bachche ki
nuni se pishab tapakti hai... tap tap tap..!!"

It was crazy... watchin these 20 mins.... the rest of the movie is not worth watchin.....
It was one hellavan experience!
Do try watchin it if u havent already... u will know what i mean!!

Saturday, November 05, 2005

Why does GoDu go boing-boing??

(APA referencing: Oka's post on D company NB in response to Kaka's question...)

Dr. John was a charming chap. He was an orthopaedic surgeon at the Care Nursing
Home in Ahmedabad. He was a pretty good surgeon but as a husband he was
unfaithful to his wife.

He had a raging affair going on with one of the nurses in his hospital.
That particular day the nurse was very attractively dressed. She had all the
charm of a lady - a terrific hairstyle, short miniskirt, a suave handbag and a
yapping dog.

Although John was immediately ensnared by her looks, he didnt look kindly upon
the idea of bringing a dog to the hospital.

"Why did you have to bring this devil to the hospital. You know the amount of
mischief he does. You cant even tie him up. He'll bark his lungs out and
distrub all the patients."

"Honey, dont worry about it. I will hold him and keep him quiet."
"Ok" said John, as he turned towards another nurse approaching him.
"Doctor, there's an emergency case for you to operate on. I think it is a case
of a bone or joint transplant."
"I will be there in a minute." says John.

John and his lover nurse get ready for the operation by getting into their
gear. They had to take the dog to the operation theater as well.
"Now look what you have got us into. What do we do about this dog?"
"I'll ask him to sit and he'll sit quietly in one corner as long as I am
standing near him. Dont worry."

1 hour later, they are right in the middle of the operation. The patient did
require a transplant. John and his group of nurses manage to take out the
offending bone and keep it in a weird looking liquid in a jar.

This was the point when the doctor suddenly gets horny. He excuses himself from
other nurses and pulls his lover along. They go to a neighbouring room and
umm... well.. have a different kind of operation.

The dog, now finding that there's no one to control him, goes berserk. He leaps
onto the table and takes the bone in the jar and starts chewing on it like

The lover was the first to return. She sees what the dog has done and gets one
hell of a shock. Before John could return she grabs the half chewed bone from
the dog and puts it back in the jar. She spanks the jar and makes him sit in
one corner again. She's just set things right when the doctor walks in. She
breathes a sigh of relief.

They complete the operation successfully.
After the patient is recovered completely, John congratulates him.
"So, Mr. Godu, you are completely fine now."
"Yes. Thanks to your professional skill and God's blessings. I am completely
safe. I will take your leave now."

Godu walks out of the entrance, stands for a second, breathes in the air and
goes... boing.

That was his first boing.

Saturday, October 01, 2005

Class Farticipation?

(some excerpts from the most arbit CPs and funny events, courtesy D Co.)


Prof: Arabind DASH, is it??

Dash: No ma’am its Daash but its ok. I’m used to everyone mispronouncing it since school times.

Prof: No it’s ok; we will call you by your proper name.

Dash: Please don’t ma’am; I am more comfortable with Dash now!!

MANAC: arbit CP

Dash: My production does not depend on how much i produce.....


  • Shveta: Solar cookers need less oil etc, so we can target the old people, or heart patients cuz they need minimum oil in food..
Dash: Yes, with the heart patient market in India growing....

  • Momo: We must promote monsoon so more people visit our resort during monsoon
Dash: Yes, we can have a rain dance for them..


Challenge CPs!!!

CCPs for the day: Spiderman, Superman, SubSaharan, villages croppin up, Oka/Karthik!

  • Prof: what should we name our cement brand?
Prostee: We should name it Oka/Karthik cement, after Lord Karthik, the God of
Construction (Erection!!)

  • Student: Instead of Mukhiyas and all we must concentrate on other people like the masons.
Prostee: No, we should definitely concentrate on the Mukhiya, after all he is SUPERMAN for the people!!

Khakee: Madam its not about being a SPIDERMAN or SUPERMAN, its to do with......(blah blah blah)

and above all, our Uncle Shobhit aka Thoku

Uncle: No one is Superman. With villages cropping up in India, we must move away from this Sub- Saharan region, and ...... (etc etc etc)

(Will keep updating this space, so keep checkin!!)

Nostalgia - 2

(this is my favourite and the best poem i write when i was young..)

Present day problems,
Which keeps us busy,
When faced by me,
I really feel dizzy!

Water problems, air problems,
Food problems, place problem,
So much pollution, so much confusion,
Is made by our huge population.

Forests are cleared, trees are cut,
Many people are happy, but-
What about the destroyed nature?
Will it become earth's worse feature?

Nostalgia - 1

(this is the first poem i ever wrote!!)

My horse is very gay,
He eats oats and hay,
He takes us for a ride,
And in the stable he is tied.

He is something like a mule,
But he doesnt run on fuel,
Babies are called foal,
and sometimes they are coloured coal!


Friday, September 23, 2005

Another Day Without you... (II)

Another day,
Another day without you,
Towake up to the dull morning sun,
The senseless chirping birds,
The lifeless colourful flowers.

To begin yet another day/ week/ month,
Without your smile to brighten up the morning,
Without your deep intense eyes to lull me to sleep in the afternoon,
Without your soft feather touch to rouse me in the evening,
Without your luscious lips to kiss me good night.

I yearn for you, your touch, your kiss,
I yearn for your presence in my life,
The only thing which makes it worth living.

But alas, I know,
I know you are not here, you cant be.
And I have to, yet again, spend another day, another hour, another minute, another moment, Without you, waiting for you.
Waiting for the moment when we are together again,
And this time, for ever,
With nothing and no one to tear us apart, ever again.

And thus, I go on and on,
Only so I can finally be with you.
But till then I am alone and incomplete,
For yet another day.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005


(Now presenting some of the golden words of Kaka, pka AC pka Arvind Chandrashekhar, a proud D Co. member... Read at your Own RISK!!)

Q: What is the opposite of Dominoes?
A: Domi-doesn’t-know!

Fidoe (at 4 in the morning): Is anyone awake?
Kaka: I am sodium. (Main Hoon ‘Na’!!)
Fidoe (to Kaka in response to his previous response): You are Incorrigible!
Kaka: No, im in D0604!

Flexi: Whats in a name?
Kaka: 4 letters.. a, e, m and n.. in different order though…

Fidoe: I have a nemesis: IC (and sometimes QM)
Kaka: I have a nemebro…

Jerky: BOL
Kaka: Kya bolun?
Jerky: Kuch nahin, bas sun.
Kaka: kyun, moon kyun nahin?
Jerky: aaj AMAVASYA hai!!
Kaka: Nahin aaj monday hai!!

(when Moti made some comment)

Prostee: Moti, mug le beta!
Kaka: Moti mug le Niche!!
(CCCF: Beta: fin club, Niche: Mktg club!)

Prostee: Aaj main upar, aaj main Niche..
Kaka: Aaj subsidiary upar, aaj subsidiary Niche!
Prostee: Aaj subsinoteboook upar, aaj subsinotebook Niche!
Kaka: Aaj kuchsinotebook upar, aaj kuchsinotebook Niche!
Prostee: Aaj kuchsicoinbook upar, Aaj kuchsicoinbook Niche!
........................................ (and it goes on n on n on)
Prostee: Stop! it looks like some language spoken in the rainforests!
Kaka: ra-out forest!
Flexi: reddy-ut forest!
Khakee: Blue-dyut forest!
Kaka: Bluedyut fo-works!
Flexi: bluedyut fo-unrest!
Kaka: bludyut fo-worldbank-rest!

(Im thinking of renaming this post as Kaka-isms and Prostee-isms....)

Santosh(the day before announced eco quiz): i predict there will be a quiz tomorrow!
Prostee: you are like lifeless boozevendor...(bejan daruwala!!)

Lusty: Ive lost my roon keys, so if anyone sees it let me know.
Kaka: whats the room no.?
Lusty: its D-2030.. how does it help?
Kaka: just in case i find it lying about, or telling the truth about...!!!

Q: What would you be called if you were seeing Kammo???
A: A-Kammo-dating!!

Oka: Dont remind me of eco.
Pondy: eco eco eep eep
eco eco eep eep
Kaka: You sound like the roadrunner suffering from hiccups!

An apprehensive and tensed Shyam posts on the D Co nb at 1:15 pm-
Shyam: Quiz?
Kaka: No, thanks!

Mishti: Group 2 takes Non-Life Insurance for marketing assignment.
Kaka: why? you think your project will be that bad??

(I dunno the origin of this one, but nevertheless...)
Q: If Preeta Vyas is teaching us marketing pre-mid-term, who is gonna teach us post-mid-term?
A: Post-a Vyas!

(I am in the process of getting more inputs, and will keep posting as and when I get something. So keep checking this space for updates on Kaka-isms...)

Saturday, August 27, 2005

Once upon an IC class...

It was a normal beginning to a normal day. The IC class started, and so did Shilpa: sleeping!! Not even one minute had passed by, of the very first class, but Shilpa was already off to her dreamland. She beat Chhedi to it, who joined her in a matter of minutes. Kaka in any case has sworn never to stay awake in any IC class! No wonder Kaki and Kaka are made for each other. With her hand supporting her chin, she kept dozing off, but not as explicitly as Kaka.

Sam looked very dazed, with uncombed hair, eyebrows raised, eyes wide open, trying to stay up, but unable to keep them open for more than 5 seconds at a time! Kudos to Rohit. He started sleeping after a full 30 minutes!! Rahul was a sight to see. His head supported by his hand, propped up on his elbow, he kept nodding in agreement to everything the Prof was saying, but with his eyes closed.

Even Noni, our IC stud, was finding it difficult to keep her eyes open. Atul joined the group soon with Hermy and Fifo. Arijit, bored of the class cuz he always knows everything, in fact much more than what is being discussed, decided to use his precious time more effectively by catching up on his beauty sleep.

Another sight was Kushagra: sitting at one end of the row, with his glasses in place, he was staring at the screen, albeit with his eyes closed!! Diptesh actually put his head down and slept off. Bas! As if the whole class was waiting for this! As soon as the lights were switched off, many people stopped pretending and put their head down to sleep peacefully and comfortably, including Kainchee, Lifty, and Ludo. Pondy Singh is good with camouflages. One look and you think his head is bent down, reading the text profusely. Look carefully: he is actually enjoying his trip to fantasyland! One of the most serious sleepers of the class is Mishti, who sleeps as if she is meditating or in some trance, in spite of the comical antics of the Prof!

The best part of it all was when I was writing all of this and the Prof Cold called me to explain the solution to a little problem he had written, but I had no clue about! I was too busy writing, and pretending to understand everything. Thank god that IC is based on logic, and I was able to give some arbit answer, that too all thanks to Fugga, who murmured some weird things behind the Prof’s back!

Long live (doze?) the D Company sleepers! D Company rocks!

Monday, August 22, 2005

Without you...(I)

Another day.
Another day has ended.
Without seeing your divine face,
Without my heart skipping a beat,
Without losing myself in a trance, listening to your sweet voice,
Without feeling the warmth of your breath on my neck,
Without the comfort of your touch.
Another day.

Another night.
Another night has come and gone.
Another night of solitude.
Of an empty bed, of going to sleep in my own arms.
Here I am, ending my day on a lonely note,
Wondering about my fortune, had you been here.
Yearning for you, wishing you were here,
Right here, right now.
Missing you desperately.
Pray tell me why do I love you so??

Thursday, August 11, 2005

T(he) NITE!!!

Time: 4 am
Place: CR 10
Situation: Dozens of students, poring over their work, books etc; working hard, racing their minds…

Is this an extra class?? Heck no! It’s T-Nite time folks!!

Now what is this T-Nite?? Is it some dinner party?
Actually no. It has nothing to do with food. Nor is it a single night.
T-Nite is that week of the PGP1 calendar when all sections get ready to face each other in competition, where the talent of the batch and the unity and bonding of the class are judged.

T-Nite at WIMWI is synonymous with enthusiasm, energy, sleeping in class and loads of fun. It is that time when all classmates get to know each other, something that they did not get enough time to do before. This is evident from the fact that till now many of us did not know the names/dorm names of many of our classmates, or had spoken to them for the first time. But it is never too late. The foundation for the bond which we would share over the next two years is laid during this very eventful week.

Apart from bringing people together, T-Nite also acts as a platform for students to display their talents, be it dancing, singing, mimicry, sketching, acting or simply velagiri!! There is a lot of fun, masti, jokes and nautanki going on at all times.

Typically, after classes, the section gets together and prepares for the upcoming performances and events, often until the wee hours of the morning. So it is not unusual to find people eating, drinking, studying and even sleeping in the classroom. They stay here all day, leaving only for meals, trips to the loo, sleeping, and of course to talk to their GFs/BFs in private!! Loads of coffee, tea and cigarettes are consumed in an effort to stay up as long as possible.

In spite of being well aware of the fact that the T-Nite takes so much of our time and effort, the professors are relentless. We have to keep up with studies and be prepared for surprise quizzes. So how do the students manage to keep up, given the hectic schedule? Once again the dynamics and synergy of the class come together. For each lecture, some students study the case beforehand and take remedial sessions for the benefit of the whole class. So no matter how hard the professors try to cold call, most students are well prepared for the classes. However nothing can be done to avoid the sleepless nights and the sleepy faces, droopy eyes, stifled yawns and falling heads in class the next day. So the students resort to poking sleeping neighbours and diverting the prof’s attention away from them or passing time by asking lotsa pointless questions! :)

T-nite also brings with it physical and mental exertion, loss of sleep and appetite which cause illnesses, disrupting the mood of celebration. But the euphoria of the event is such that the illnesses disappear as quickly as they arrived!!

But T-Nite is a package deal, with its goods and bads. Since it is all about competition, and sometimes it can get ugly. In a bid to outdo the others, sometimes people get carried away and pass remarks, or indulge in actions which provoke or hurt the sentiments of others. But such incidents, by and large are rare, with some amount of bantering accepted by all, in the spirit of celebration.

T-Nite is one event the PGP1s will remember throughout their course, rather throughout their lives. The friendships, relationships forged during this period last a long long time, and for some, a life time. Given the academic pressure at WIMWI, such activities really boost up the morale, enthusiasm energy and performance of the students, in addition to creating a more jovial environment. Each batch enjoys it as much as, if not more than, their seniors. Hope WIMWI continues with this tradition for all years to come!!

3 Cheers for T-Nite!!

Tuesday, July 19, 2005


"Life is full of coincidences..." or so my dear friend Medha once commented.
And i agree with her. All of us at some point or the other come across such amazing coincidences that it becomes difficult to imagine it is all luck, and not especially designed so by the heavenly powers that be!
I have come a across hundreds of coincidences myself, mainly regarding people having the same likes/dislikes, place of residence, thoughts and ideas, names, etc.
But shall I tell you the most fascinating coincidences of all that I have come across??

In my family, my mother is an astrologer, my father is a doctor, and their daughter is called Aditi.
My parents have Kumars as family friends, where Mr. Yogesh is an astrologer, Dr. (Mrs.) Alka is… you guessed it right... a doctor, and they have only one child, a girl, called
Also they have another family as their long time friends: Dr. Charak. It’s obvious by his name that he is a doctor. He is also a practicing astrologer and teacher of the same in Bhartiya Vidya Bhavan. In fact my mom learnt astrology under him only.
And guess what? He has 3 daughters, out of one which is called Aditi!!

3 families, all with a doctor, an astrologer, and a daughter named Aditi! And all 3 know each other! Some coincidence that, isn’t it??

Maine aapko pehle bhi kahin dekha (and sometimes suna) hai...

I suffer from this irritating habit of associating strangers/new acquaintances’ faces with people I already know. One month at IIMA and I already have look-alikes of Gaurav’s brother Saurav, my school friend Nishu, etc in my class, and I keep telling them how much they resemble my friends… in fact Garima, who looks exactly like Nishu (and she agreed with me when I showed her Nishu’s photo) also sounds exactly like my friend Priyanka!! Is it a coincident that both girls have spent considerable time in Chandigarh??

Not only this, I se a number of faces everyday which remind me of someone or the other. And my fellow-IIMAites would agree with me when I say that we have a ditto copy of Vivek Oberoi in our batch… I mean the guy looks so much like him, it’s not funny!! I’m sure by now he must be sick and tired of people staring at him or telling him he looks like VO!!

They say there are 7 people with the same face as yours in the world, including yourself, which means effectively all of us have 6 look-alikes each. Wow! That’s a lot of humshakals!! I had one… my identical twin sister, but she died when she was 2 weeks old. Since then I have never come across anyone who looks like me, nor have I been told by someone that they know someone who looks like me. Except once I thought a girl who appears in the song “kuku-ku” from the movie “Pyar tune kya kiya” as a fisherwoman looked somewhat like me. That’s the closest anyone has come to resemble me.

I wonder where the rest of the look-alikes are… I’d sure love to meet them someday!!
And then wonder... “Kya hum kumbh ke mele mein bichhad gaye the ya….”

What's going on??

What’s going on???

Yes, that’s the question I ask myself everyday when I think about my current position and future potential in academics at IIMA…
What with seven subjects in pre mid-term, and 6 going over my head, I am pretty confused!

MANAC: the god of all subjects, it stands for managerial accountancy, but I think it’s a pretty maniacal subject!! I am a commerce student; I have studied accounts till class 12, and thought that MANAC won’t be so hard, but I sure was in for a surprise! I don’t know nuts about what these people are doing in the cases that we get! And the namak on the ghaav is that the engineers here have mastered it faster and better than I ever could! Who says commerce people have an advantage??

Or Eco students: we have a subject called economic analysis. Being a business economics student I was very happy. But the professors here have a way of making your whole life’s studies redundant in an instant: in no time we were showered with concepts I had never even heard of, and deep analyses of cases, which went way OTT! But I guess such are the ways of this institute!

OM: now don’t even start talking about it. Operations management is a very interesting but a highly technical and complicated subject. Now I know many would like to differ with me on this, but frankly it is a little out-of-ordinary for non-engineers… at least for me it is. But I enjoy it a lot, even if I don’t understand it much! ;)

HRM or human resource management is also a subject we had touched upon in school and college, but it been made very interesting by our instructor. He is a little intimidating and condescending, but the way he pulls out HR issues from deep down in the case, is awesome!

QM: now that’s a difficult one: with all the simplex and graphs and excel solvers and equations and network problems etc., I feel pretty lost! But fear not, I have my neighbour, PaRo, who is Eveready to help me out of the Quantitative Methods mess!! Cheers to PaRo!!

Then there is IC (intro to comps): my nemesis. Humse ka bhool Hui Jo ye saza humka mili… now I’m getting outta control… but what to do?? All this excel spreadsheets, complex formulae (IF nestled in AND nestled in MATCH nestled in INDEX… it goes on n on n on...) this subject has the honour of presenting me with y first “?” grade in the term!!

Last but not the least is WAC, or written analysis and communication. It’s basically to help develop and improve business communication skills. It’s a pretty decent course, and we have a real fun instructor: we discuss options available in a particular case, and then write a report on it. The best part is the discussion, where our prof comes up with funny and creative comments on our suggestions etc.!! This really helps ease all the tension which is associated with the WAC report, when everyone is running around to complete it before the stipulated time. The second best part of the course is, the WAC run, wherein all the late bloomers are running to submit the hard copy of their repots, intercepted by our seniors who are trying to delay them ( a delay of even a minute leads to lower grade points!!) and dunk them with water on their way back! Fortunately in our first and only assignment till now, I finished the report and submitted it well in time, but not everyone was lucky. PaRo was wearing her running shoes at 4:20, while getting a printout of her report, and ran all the way to the class room, just in time for the submission!!! It was fun, watching them run and the seniors trouble as well as cheer them!! Thankfully everyone reached on time, even if they were 1 second away from penalty!!

So in a nutshell, these are the subjects I have, and the way I am faring in them... everyday we prepare in advance for our classes (or try to) and attend classes next day (this we HAVE to) and be attentive and not sleep (that also we try very hard to… but….) and what does the PGP office do to reward us? Give us a quiz (read surprise test) almost everyday now!! Now I’m not a religious girl but I sure do hope dear God becomes pleased with me for some reason and showers me with… the answers to all quiz questions!!!


P.S.: Mom Dad, if you are reading this, don't fret... IIMA is not chucking me out just yet!! ;)

Disclaimer: the ideas expressed are totally mine and events described are 100% authentic, though teh inetrpretation may change. Any resemblance to the life of, or reference to a person, living ( hopefully not dead) is not coincidental... i mean it!! Cuz thats how it is here at WIMWI!!

What's in a name??

Finally the deciding day has come: I have been given my dorm name: FIDOE.
Now don’t go wondering/asking me what it means… its CCCF (Wimwi term, meaning: conceptual clarity and contextual familiarity) is top secret!!
What is interesting is that the word FIDO is related to “dogs” because it comes from fidelity which means trust, loyalty, faith.
This made me search on my name, and I came across lots of information which I did not know. Till date I believed that my name, Aditi, doesn’t have any meaning. It’s the name of a rishi’s wife, who was the mother of devtas or gods in heaven.
But boy! Was I wrong!!! Here is what I came to know about moi:

In Hindu mythology, Aditi was the goddess of the boundless sky. Her name means "free from bonds" or "the unfettered" or "Limitless" and the Vedas hint that she was once all-encompassing. She undoubtedly pre-dates them, and was once “the goddess of the past and the future, the seven dimensions of the cosmos, the celestial light which permeates all things, and the consciousness of all living things.”Aditi, is called the free one, because in Sanskrit her name means "boundless," and is considered an archaic mother goddess, depicted in Hindu, Vedic literature. She represents unlimited space and consciousness, hence infinity or eternity. According to the Rig Veda Aditi is said to be the wife of Kashyapa or of Brahma and the mother of the Aditya, under whose constraint the universe is made possible; and she also personifies death because she consumes everything. She is also considered to be the mother of Hari and other legends have her as the mother of Indra. No human physical features of her are drawn, though she is sometimes identified in the guise of a cow (don’t quite like this bit). Aditi was believed to be a guardian goddess of prosperity and could free her devotees of problems and clear away obstacles.

Wow!! Now I am able to appreciate my name even more! Though its popularity gets on my nerves:
In school it was ok, I was mainly the only Aditi, 1-2 juniors may have shared my name...
But in college, my senior, batch mate, junior: I had 3 Aditis around me!!
And even in IIMA, there are 3 Aditis, one in each dorm!!
Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against the other Aditis… just that I miss the uniqueness of the name. But I do think it’s a pretty name, whatsay??

Sunday, July 03, 2005


“All my bags are packed ready to go
I’m standing here outside the door
I hate to wake you up and say goodbye
But the dawn is breaking, it’s early morn
The taxi is waiting; he’s blowing its horn
I’m already so lonely I could die…

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you’ll wait for me
Hold me like you’ll never let me go…

‘Cuz I’m leaving on Rajdhani Express…

Confused??? Something wrong with my lyrics??
No Sir! This is exactly how I felt on June 20th evening (I know my lyrics still say morning... but I did not want to change that) when I was to leave for Ahmedabad to pursue my higher studies.
I had packed 3 suitcases full of all imaginable and unimaginable things, after checking and rechecking and re-rechecking and finally checking one last time everything was in.
And then I left my home… with my doggie barking madly behind closed doors… not sure if I would see either ever again, since my parents may shift home while I’m away, and my doggie, who is very old, may just kick the bucket in my gham!!

Anyway so I finally boarded the train after lots of tearful hugs and kisses to my dad and Gaurav. Mom and Rachit accompanied me to Ahmedabad. I had 2 more IIMA bound people going with me, and met 2 more on the journey.

The journey as such was comfortable, though God knows why I had kept hoping wishing and praying the train would not be derailed/blown up since I was traveling for the first time to the state of Gujarat, which is famous for both natural and man made calamities. (read: riots etc.)

Finally on the morning of June 21st we finally reached Amdavad Junction. We left in a taxi for IIMA campus. Reached there, submitted papers, got my dorm room. Wow! What a surprise! Such small rooms! No comforts, leave alone luxury! The fan was too slow, the room was dusty, no dustbin, broken comp chair, power points not working, and the worst: no mirror in the girl’s dorm rooms!!! Nooooooooo….

“Mommy I want to go home…” is what I wanted to screech out. Nevertheless we began to unpack and set the room. Got the repairs done, cleaned it up, made the room habitable.

Finally we got over with it, and left to search for a suitable hotel for my family to stay in. after half an hour in an auto, we zeroed in on a small hotel, and paid the guy 25 bucks. 25 bucks!!! Can you believe that? I sure can’t! The autos here are soooo cheap; it’s not even funny…

Anyway after settling down we shopped for things that I did not carry. And after all the time, energy and money spent, I was all set for the next two years to come. And then came the day when my family had to leave for Delhi. After lots of tips, caveats, blessings and tears my mom and brother left on June 23rd.

And Aditi Varma was left all alone, in a tiny room, all by herself, amongst a sea of strangers, for the next two years.

Well that’s what happened in the past week. Lots of new faces, names, rules, people, surroundings, responsibilities, odd jobs…
Mom dad brother and Gaurav call up everyday to see how I’m doing.
I miss my house, my loved ones, my friends…everything in Delhi.
But I’m well settled now. I have settled down in this hostel life comfortably, and am gearing up for the extremely hectic but hopefully equally enriching and interesting life at IIMA!

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Bank upon them???

Recently I had to visit a few banks to procure an education loan for my further studies. I had a lot of fliers from different banks with competitive terms and rates of interest. There are many banks who provide financial assistance. However best deals can be had only fom government banks. But since I wanted it for IIM-A, I wasn't very worried. Armed with all documents and confidence, I set out on my quest, sure that they would process it without a hitch. Boy! Was I wrong!!

I first went to the great Indian Bank nearby. Small dingy office, loads of people stuffed in, no water/ac, lots of confusion. Nevertheless my mother and I found our way in, looking for the person dealing with Loans. After a few mins of going from one desk to the other, we finally were guided to the right one, which, alas, was empty.. The officer had chosen that very moment to go for a stroll in the park or something, because we never saw him all the time that we were there. We waited for 15 minutes, than asked where he was. No one, not 1 person, had a clue where he was or why he wasn't on his desk. And no one bothered to find out either.

I looked around me. There were so many people clueless and without guidance. No one was helping them out. There was a very very old lady, who apparently could not speak in hindi. She came alone. Finally a stranger woman, a co-customer, not a bank employee, helped her get to the right individual. I caught some fragments of their conversation. Apparently the old woman had not received pension for the past 6-7 months, and was finding it difficult to survive. The employee said " We dont know. Get the death certificate, employment details, pension/bank details." The old woman was worried: how in the world would she get hold of all this, this frail little lady who could hardly walk???? But the staff was apathetic. They had the " We dont care how you do it, it is your problem, not ours" attitude. Poor thing.

Meanwhile my mother started getting impatient. Although we were told to speak to the officer and not the branch manager, she barged in his room, and started off about my admission and our requirements. The branch manager said " Why have you come here? Go out and talk to teh officer in charge. Don't waste my time." We told him the guy was not available. He called another officer to confirm this. He spoke in a regional language, but his conversation was seasoned with enough english/understandable words for us to deduce he was upset that they let us in, that he did not have time for us. He then delivered the same, saying he was busy, had something very important to do. Mom started to say " My daughter has got through IIM-A. We got a letter from your Ahmedabad branch manager stating that their regional branch would be happy to grant us the loan." With a I could'nt care less tone he said that all this doesnt matter to him. If we needed anything, we would have to come some other time. Goodbye. You can leave now.

Thats it. He did not even offer the two ladies a seat, forget water etc. Whatever little time that he spoke to us, he was curt, almost rude, and he got back to his work. We just looked at him, then at each other, silent, enraged at being dismissed like this, but aware that we didnt have much of a choice. Without a word, we left the premises, vowing never to return.

I was thoroughly disappointed that day. I thought banks were not just about numbers and money, but also people. If you have a customer, isn't it fair you treat them well? Give them reasons why their work is being delayed or they are not being attended to, apologise for inconvenience caused, give other options according to the customer's needs, urgency of matter and convenience. Help those who are not that bank-savvy, instead of avoiding customer queries/difficulties, by absolving themselves of all mistakes and responsibility, passing everything on to the head of the customer!!

I really wanted to tell that guy at Indian Bank "Mr. Manager, you may be hot shot in your bank, but I could teach you a thing or two about customer satisfaction. "

Having worked with American Express and dealing with hundreds of customers everyday, I know how bad it feels when you leave them disapppointed, or how cherished they feel when they are treated well. Treating well doesnt mean give money to the undeserving or doing anything else which lead to a loss, but making the customer feel s/he is cherished, and if they are being told a service NO, giving a solid logical reason. And even then not to despair: there are other options available.

Well thats the way it works at American Express, but not Indian Bank. And thats why both banks are where they are. If they continue like this, they wont be left with too many patrons soon!

Saturday, May 21, 2005

My Family Coolest!!

My Family:
I have my dad who is a 60 year old doctor: an ultrasonologist, a private practitioner.
My mom is a 50 yr old homemaker and an astrologer.
My brother is 19, in college, doing graduation by correspondence from Delhi University and chartered accountancy simultaneously and making a good khichdi out of them both!!
I also have a 12 yr old sister… with a black nose, long brown ears, brown coat and a long hairy tail… no I’ve not fought with her and taking revenge by describing her like this… she realy looks like that: she is my 12 yr old long haired dachshund Tiffany.
Hum Paanch… we live in a little house in Delhi where I’ve been born and brought up.

My dad: the only thing I can say about him is since I have known him, he has always been my grandpa and my mom’s his second wife.
Since they got married… dad has sported white hair… not by choice… genetically he suffers with premature greying of hair.
So ALL my friends always thought he is my grandpa.
Also there is a 10 year gap between dad and mom… so some people actually think my mom is his second wife or something!!

My mom: she is a totally lost case… she must have a hearing problem… cuz she NEVER hears things right!!!
And what she hears is … well.. SO different from what is being talked about that it is not funny!
But she is a sweetheart… she is so innocently stupidly funny!
And she is like the guys… dominating, drives a car well (yes, being a Woman she drives Very well!), drinks, used to smoke..
Not saying drinking /smoking is cool /right… just that she is just not a typical mom!
She is absolutely the coolest Mum ever!

My bro: well he is a mixed bag… I really adore him for being funny and cool.. but he is also very sarcastic and un-senti at times.
So ours is a love-hate realtionship… I love AND hate him, he pretty much HATES me!!
Yeah yeah I know he is young and a guy so he loves but does not show it etc etc… so after fighting about all this and stuff like “why cant u call me didi when I am 3 years elder to you?”, I have given up on him, and accepted him as he is!!
Which has recently become very interesting: he listens to weird music, have got 4 holes in his ears pierced, got reeeeeeeeally long hair, and is contemplating getting a tattoo done!! Most people say (and I quite agree with them) he looks like Jesus Christ!! (No offense, dear God!)
Also recently he has turned into a metrosexual, as far as his appearance is concerned!
Everyday, without fail he buffs his nails, shampoos and conditions his hair (only with Ultra Doux), applies all sorts of things on his face, lips etc!!
He takes double the time I take to get ready!!

My dog: no comments: we call her by all sorts of names: tifi, tifu , chipo, chimi, champa, chipi, tipi, tipsi, chimpu, chipu, futti etc etc.
And I have names her confusa-multiple-tiffnitias!!!
That’s her species name. You see, we don’t think she is a dog: she is as coward as a mouse, as fat as a buffalo/hippo/elephant, as dumb as a donkey..
So you see we are confused what kind of a creature she is and she has multiple animal traits!!
She is a lazy thing, lying aroung doing nothing. I would have called her a sack of potatoes, but even a sack of potatoes is more useful than i refer to her as a sacj of rotten potatoes!!
Earleir she used to bark at strangers or welcome us home…
These days she growls/wags her tail lying in one corner, with eyes closed, if at all she chooses to react to anything.
Whenever we see she is not moving, we have to shake her to see if she is still alive or not!
She is also quite a big Dhabba on the Dog community… she has killed over a dozen mice but is shit scared of cats.. even kittens!!!
We are planning to get a new dog to spice up her life a bit... I knwo she is 12 and about to die... but I realy wish she lives for 3-4 years more so I can take her with me as my dahej!! ;-)

As you can make out ours is a totally crazy family: we are also totally crazy about each other!
My parents are also the MOST chilled out people I have ever seen: so much so that we can talk about anything on this earth with them. Heck I remember once we even watched uncensored Kamasutra together at home! Boy was that embarassing, yet fun!
Earlier, during my teenage, I thought I was so unlucky to be stuck with this family, but since I became 17/18, I realised how lucky I am to be with them! They make my life complete. I dunno what I would have done without them.
And seriously, given a chance to choose the ideal set of parents in my next life, I would still choose them!!

Sunday, May 15, 2005


One fine day, a little thought made its way into my mind and created a symbolic story pertaining to the most talked about issue in our country. Let me take upthis opportunity to present to you the musings of my idle mind.

There once lived a very happy family. There was a nice young gentleman calledPaki, who had a lovely wife called Indira. They had four children, two named after Paki called P1 and P2 and two named after Indira called I1 and I2. Theylived in a big, beautiful house, with all luxuries and comforts. They were totally self sufficient in all their needs and at good terms with everyone.They had a large treasure chest in their house, which they were really proud of. In short, they lived very happily, until....

Until one day a stranger from a distant land in the west came to their door knocking. And then they committed a blunder they would never forget..... Theyinvited him to stay with them, for as long as he wished. With passage of time,Mr. Britton, as he called himself, began sweet-talking and winning over everyone in the household. He started telling both husband and wife how each was more superior to the other and ought to live independently. The innocent couple, blinded by the radiance of the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow painted by the stranger, began to believe his every word, and began fighting with each other.

Slowly and subtlely Mr. Britton created a rift between them and startedc ompletely controlling their thoughts, deeds and words. Soon he managed to get his hands on the treasure chest too, by breaching the trust of the people who had put their lives in his hands. When Indira and Paki came to know of this,they felt betrayed and chucked Mr. Britton out of the house. But the damage had been done. The treasure was lost, their relationship was totally spoilt and in the end, they had to split.

Everything was divided - the house, the personal belongings, even the children!I1 and I2 went to stay with Indira and P1 and P2 with Paki. Now I1 and P1 , whowere older, more mature, understanding and kind, were broken-hearted, but I2and P2, young and hot blooded, nursed grudges against each other and the"other" family, little realising that there was no family if all of them were separated. While splitting, I2 and P2 created a lot of commotion and bad blood:they became violent and physically hurt the very same people they once so loved! I1 and P1 were greatly saddened by this behaviour and prayed for peace.

At last Paki and Indira settled down in their designated parts of the house.Since they had divided one house into two parts, they faced a lot of problems.They were single-handedly trying to face the harsh realities of life that were so easily taken care of when they were together. They started looking at each other as their enemies and swore to protect their kin from each other. Although they had divided everything, they still had occasional fights about various possessions, subject to mockery by onlookers. Others started to interfere in their personal matters, and filled their mind with filth about each other,increasing their hatred. Soon they started believing that Paki was Muslim andIndira was Hindu and then started the debate on who was better, with neither side agreeing to be any less than the other. I2 and P2, on their part, would throw filth on each other's premises, and get in, in the dark of the night and trouble each other and the others.

This is not just a story, a figment of my imagination. Look closely and you will see its resemblance with the most important problem faced by us today: our relationship with our neighbour. Paki is none other than Pakistan, and Indirais India. Mr.Britton is none other than the British. I1 and P1 are those people in India and Pakistan who do not have any hard feelings against anyone, and I2and P2 are those who do. The treasure chest is what made the pre-divided India to be called the Golden Bird. The Partition was a very difficult time: the land was divided, and people were forced to leave their houses. History is witnessto the horrendous and gory bloodshed, the tears of the doomed, the death of somany dreams and hopes. Women were assaulted and men were killed in the most atrocious and blood-curdling manner. Members of the same family were thirsty for each other's blood!

After the partition, both countries lost out to each other in terms of labour,industries, minerals, land, resources, money etc, and are facing problems till date. They still fight over the Line-of-control and Pakistan-occupied-Kashmir and the state of J&K. Other countries, some pally with Pakistan, some withIndia began to interfere, making matters worse. Religious differences were made the crux of the problem. Both countries speak (inadmittently do) ill of each other. Children in Pakistan are taught in schools that India is their enemy.Indians go to the border to spit on the "Other" side! There is enough of crossborder terrorism to make life hell for those living near the borders who reallydon’t care about these political differences.

Who has gained? Certainly not India and Pakistan, who are still suffering fromthe aftermath. Certainly not the people in those times, who still suffer from nightmares, if they are not dead already. Certainly not us, who lose so much time , effort, money and precious lives of our soldiers in trying to protect our frontiers! But there are those who will gain, after the two countries fight and fight and become the reason for the downfall of each other: they will come to pick up the bones. Do we really want this? Where is the pretty picture everyone painted at the time of the partition? All we seem to have been left with is hatred, sorrow, death, destruction, tears, and terrorism.

Ah! Terrorism! Another oft-misinterpreted term. We have some wrong perceptions,wrong equations, which we must correct. What we must understand today is thatits not
Its I2 + P2 = TERRORISTS and I1 + P1 = INNOCENT

There are good people and bad people on both sides. All Pakistanis do not hate us, nor do All Indians hate them. I don’t hate Pakistanis. I only hate the terrorists, in both countries, the ones causing both countries immense grief.It’s high time we recognise this big difference and get on with doing what is right.

My story does not intend to preach anything. Through this I merely wish to ask every Pakistani and Indian to go for introspection and ask himself/herself just one question: Whose side are you on, I1 + P1 or I2 + P2? Think properly and decide wisely and well, because on your decision, DEPENDS OUR FUTURE!!

Good God!!

In today's world of the Gen X (or Y or Z), the young and the restless are also increasingly becoming the atheist and the faithless. The turn of the century bringing about immense advances in science and medicine, bringing us closer toand opening up secrets of life, and the need to be practical to keep up withthe fast pace of life, leaves us with little time for our faith and our GOD.

Essentially there are two groups of people - those who believe in God, andthose who do not. And then there are those like me who are a little confused about the whole deal. The scientific, rational and practical person in usrefuses to endorse such views, as doing "poojas" and keeping "vrats" and "idolworship". We do not believe in the supernatural, ghosts, life after death, orso-called sciences like astrology and Vaastu Shastra.

Traditionally I do not believe in God. To me, idols in places of worship are stone, and the rites and rituals made up to appease the Gods and ward off evil seem ridiculous. According to me, religion is man made, conceptualized to appease gods and save oneself from disaster, in the days of the early man, when mankind had no idea what was fire or why it rained or that earthquakes cannot be averted through prayers. But today, when we know so much, it still seems we are none the wiser.

As Karl Marx once quoted " Religion is the opium of the people". What has religion given us in the current world scenario? The innumerable number ofriots and Jihads? The murder of joy and peace, one brother killing the other,all in the name of God? Petty religious issues taking precedence over thefeeling of humanity? Look around you, and you will find nothin more. If this is what we get for believing in God, then do we really need Him?

The answer is YES, WE DO! There is a downside of believing in God and following a religion, but there is also an upside. Atleast in the name of God, some poor souls get some money and food in the name of alms and "langars", some people do not commit sins sometimes for the fear of wrath of God, some peope actually do good, say good, think good, believing it to be the path to find God, be safe from devil and hell, and go to heaven after death.

I say- hell and heaven, both are on the earth only, depends on how you look at your life. Depending upon your hardwork and attitude, you may have all the pleasures of heaven here itself, or you may make your life worse than hell. God(good) and Devil (evil), they are you, inside you, inside all of us. It is uptous to decide which form has to surface and be dominant. Some people have adominant devil, some have a dominant god, but all of us have both. Depends upon how we develop ourselves.

Why does a common man need God? What does he look for in Him? What does God provide him? Broadly speaking, God is needed because of the following reasons:

• he helps us when we ae in trouble, and guides us
• he gives us happiness and provides us with material possessions
• we talk to him when our heart and mind are in conflict, share our problems and doubts
• he encourages us when all hope is lost and cheers us when we are sad
• he gives us sadness and hardships so we never forget the importance of happiness
• he punishes us when we commit sins

And to be granted the above, the religious indulge themselves in various formsof worship, like prayers, fasts, charity, festivals, rites, rituals,superstitions etc. Basically they devote themselves to live right and keep Godhappy, that is the source of their happiness.

I am only a little different. I see God in my loved ones, namely my family andother important relationships. I believe that these people are the ones who give me hope, love, guidance, appreciation, help, happiness, sadness,encouragement etc. They fulfil my physical, emotional, financial, material,spiritual, mental needs. They tell us when we go wrong and punish us if we commit sins in spite of knowing about them, they teach us what is good and what is bad.

In short, I believe that if I devote myself to the happiness of these people, Iam going to be happy. They are my God for whom I will toil, they are the path for me to find inner peace. All this IS a bit unconventional, but the questionis, would I be termed as a believer, or an atheist?You Decide!

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

The Idiot Box

Ever thought of your life without Man’s greatest and most important invention?No no, not the wheel, but your life and soul…. your Television!!! We never tire calling it the idiot box, but can you really imagine one day without your own telly? Without the unending saga of Kyunki Saas for Mom, serious Aaj Tak Newsfor Dad, Bugs Bunny and Popeye for kids, evening aarti for Dada/Dadi, Friendsfor Didi/Bhaiya, our world does seem so lost and boring, doesn’t it? We can’teven start imagining what would happen if we were made to live without any television to bring happiness and sunshine in our mundane lives! Just the other day, I encountered a similar situation. The cable-walla had some problems in his connection, and thus, the television was out for the day! And what a day that was!

Mummy, who sits down to get her daily dose of the soaps after doing her household chores, had become really frustrated out of boredom. “How do I pass my day without seeing which Saas is troubling her Bahu, which woman is having an extra marital affair, which scheme the vamp is cooking in her mind?” Littlebrother was outraged: “the TV had to go out today, of all the days, when theGrand Prix is on?????” Surely God is mean, to inflict such cruelty upon Schumacher-fearing/loving/worshipping fans!” But nothing to beat what Dad had to go through…. “Ok, so we cannot watch Des Mein Nikla Hoga Chand, but Pardes mein nikla hai chand, or not, how do we know without the news? What is this world coming to?”

And I sit back and observe, the way this little idiot box has taken over the lives of millions of people! Gone are the days, when the husbands used to come back from work, and TALK to their wives, instead of propping up their legs on the coffee table and watching Sachin bat, or Saddam being hounded. Gone are the days when the kids ACTUALLY went out and played! When was the last time your child, having taken out precious time from tuitions, classes, computer and television, went out to play/cycle/walk etc.? Can’t remember? Nor can I! There just does not seem to be enough interaction with the outside world, since the television has entered our lives. We never seem to have enough time with our spouses, kids, parents, friends…

But can we put the blame squarely on this box? Are we ourselves not to blame?Its us who should chalk out our priorities, decide what’s good and bad for us,what we should do, how often, how long, with whom we should spend time.I am just waiting for the day when the kids really engage in recreation outside the four walls of the house; the teens actually take out time to build upon their fragile relationship with their parents, siblings, grandparents; a family actually sits together and eats and talks; a husband actually spends time with his wife after a long day’s work, and we understand more about the people with whom we live and interact, rather than Jennifer Lopez or Tulsi Virani! And I do hope that day comes soon! Ok, I have to go now; I have missed the first 2 seconds of Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki already!

The Bride's Woe

Ah! The day has come
When she has to leave,
It’s here so soon
She can’t believe.

It seems like only yesterday
When she had turned twenty,
But now, her time left at home
Doesn’t seem plenty.

In a flash, come all
The sweet memories of her past,
She smiles, she laughs, she cries at them
For her, forever will they last.

When she was in pain, her mother comforted her,
When her self was dwindling, her father supported her,
Her brother whose shouts and fights she had to bear,
Even in his eyes today, she can see tears.

No longer is she free
To walk and talk the way she wants,
Even though her in-laws seem friendly,
These thoughts linger and haunt.

“ She’s not too fair and a bit too fat!”
“Don’t you know how to do it? It’s done like that!”
“Sit like this, don’t stand like that!”
The thought of hearing these in the future makes her sad.

She sits in front of the mirror and stares,
At her nubile and naïve appearance.
“Don’t worry you can do it,” echoes her mind,
Thus assured of the future, she gathers her confidence and endurance.

At last, beautiful and graceful she joins her groom,
And they steadfastly take vows together.
Entwining in the eternal bond of love,
They are pronounced husband and wife, forever!

Now comes the saddest part
As now, she has to depart
After bidding goodbye to parents, family and friends,
She now brings all rites and rituals to an end.

She flings back ‘wet’ grains of rice from the doorstep,
Behind her, where her parents collect them
Thus symbolically breaking all ties with her family,
With moist eyes, she leaves them.

Then the day comes when she achieves the fruit of her labor:
Today is the day, her first child, a girl, arrives.
Reminded of her own sad departure on that fateful day,
Overwhelmed, she hugs the child lovingly, with tears in her eyes.

Rain Rain Come Again!

The heavenly earthy smell wafting up the air, the pitter patter of the raindrops, the cool breeze tickling your face, the lush green faces of swayingtrees, the first bath in the first rain, eating pakoras and drinking teasitting in the balcony …. Feels heavenly, doesn’t it? Come rain, and the earthregains its youth and beauty, with all the flora and fauna dancing away toglory, welcoming the respite from the scorching heat. The young lovers fall inlove again, with each other and the romantic weather.

But where there is love, beauty, serenity, there are faulty telephone andelectricity lines, water logged roads, traffic jams, mud splashed shoes andclothes… its not as romantic as it seems. With these things, you feel as ifthere is always something present, waiting to take the fun and beauty out ofeverything. If only we were to overcome these problems, we could really enjoy the lovely weather, and really wish, Rain Rain Come Again!

OF the pitter patter of tiny feet..

I just got up after watching an interesting movie: Hyderabad Blues 2. it revolves around a couple married for 6 years, where the wife is dying to have kids, but the husband is not ready for the responsibility, the resulting fights and tension, and the falling apart of the marriage. What concerns me is not the fights or the couple… but the new trend that has started in our Indian culture as well: the decision to not have children.

Up till now what we saw was a shift in the family system: from joint family to nuclear family, then from working husbands an housewives to Double-income-no-kids households. But even they just delayed the whole process of having a family, owing to the need of settling down. It seems now though, that a completely new and never-before fashion has cropped up: of having no kids at all.

Now why on earth would one not want to have any kids at all??? Isn’t procreation what makes the world go on? Isn’t it what we are here to do, we are supposed to do?? How can anyone choose not to have kids? If everyone stops having children, what will happen to this earth? Hey chill… we don’t have to get so carried away…. Chances that everyone on this earth decides to skip having kids is as high as the sun rising from the west... but nevertheless, a surprisingly large number of people don’t seem bothered, and do not wish to take up the responsibility of progression of human population.

Many couples adopt kids, not because they are unable to have their own, but because they don’t wish to increase the already overburdening pressure of population on earth, and also wish to do something for the orphans. Some adopt because they can’t have kids of their own, either because they are medically unfit, or they are homosexuals. Still others adopt kids because they don’t have life partners, and want children, even at the cost of bringing them up single-handedly.

But there is also another group of people, steadily on the rise, who just don’t want kids. Usually the reason is financial stability. They feel they won’t be able to bring up a child well. But even such couples have at least 1 child. They may wait till they are settled and financially well off before they have children, i.e. they have kids late, maybe very late, but they do. Other reason may be that their marriage/ relationship is on the rocks and they feel having kids may weaken their stand and make it difficult for them to separate if need be, as everyone very well knows the harshest impact of divorce/separation is the children of the couple. Some people don’t have kids due to their career limitations: they believe having kids can wreak havoc on their superb career. As a result, many married actresses/models skip the having children routine, lest they ruin their figure and lose their charm, their USP, their salability.

But what does one say to/think of those people who are physically and mentally fit, financially stable, have a great marriage/relationship, well settled in their jobs… in short possess everything that takes to become great parents, but still opt out of it. They don’t even adopt. They just don’t want kids. As simple as that. Why, you ask? How can a human being naturally not want to procreate? Well… it’s an interesting issue.

These kid-less couples say that they don’t want children simply because they see no need to have kids. Now why on earth do people want to have kids, apart from our basic instinct? Mainly because they feel it’s the natural next step to a relationship/marriage. They are expected to have kids. Many women want kids because they feel incomplete unless they have given birth and experienced the miracle of god. Most couples get bored of their monotonous lives… they want some action and excitement. Some people want support in old age, while others want to continue their lineage. Some have kids just so that their child can take over their business. After all, they can’t leave all that they strove for to some stranger… don’t these things apply to this set of couples as well?

Apparently not. They don’t really care. They are too well settled in their lives, jobs, to let anything upset the schedule, including kids. They don’t think they are ready to have kids….EVER! They don’t think they will have time, or the mental preparation to handle kids. Many people have jobs/ambitions/lifestyle that would be hampered if they had kids. They don’t need support in their old age, they don’t feel empty and lonely, they don’t want to experience creating a new soul, or bringing up another human being. All in all they think having kids is a bad idea, which will ruin their life. In exchange they have to listen to a lot of hushed whispers and eager queries about WHY they don’t have any kids, and suffer a number of shocked and disapproving looks when they tell them they just don’t need kids. But it doesn’t matter to them. They are ready to take a whole lifetime of this nonsense but have made up their minds not to give in to the pressure of parents dying to have grandkids etc., and stick to their decision.

Now I personally don’t have anything against these people… after all it’s their life, and they are the ones responsible for whatever decisions they take. But I do feel that it is a great feeling to be a parent and give birth to and bring up a child. It’s really a gift from God which all of us should accept and experience. There used to be a time when I was sure I was never going to give birth to any kids because the whole process seemed so painful and difficult, right from conception to childbirth to post natal care of the child. But over the years I have mulled over the issue, and have come to the conclusion that everyone must have kids, and OWN kids if possible, including me. Now I want to be a proud mother of a naughty boy and a pretty daughter one day, no matter what I have to do to make that possible and successful! And though I can’t force these people, I sure want to tell them, “Guys, you are missing a lot in life. Life is short, enjoy it and make the most of it while you can. It’s never too late. Maybe you think children are a burden, but trust me, they are god’s most beautiful creation. Try having one child, then you will know of the innumerable pleasures they bring to us, who, in our fast paced lives, have forgotten how to smile!”

Ever wondered....

You know when i first heard of the song "Aaja mahiya" from the film "Fiza", I thought the lyricist had a very sick sense of romance... I actually thought the words were .. " Aa thook maloo main tere haathon mein.." Now why would Hrithik want to smear his spit on Neha's hands??? Whenever i hear my friends say it was their favourite song, I thought they were so weird. Much later I realised it was actually "Aa DHOOP maloo main tere haathon mein.." Oops!

Saturday, May 07, 2005


Hey All!
Welcome to my world!
I like to address myself as Sugar & Spice.. cuz that's exactly what I am!!
For more information about me and my world, do feel free to look this blogspot up whenever you can and want to...
S&S :-)