Saturday, May 21, 2005

My Family Coolest!!

My Family:
I have my dad who is a 60 year old doctor: an ultrasonologist, a private practitioner.
My mom is a 50 yr old homemaker and an astrologer.
My brother is 19, in college, doing graduation by correspondence from Delhi University and chartered accountancy simultaneously and making a good khichdi out of them both!!
I also have a 12 yr old sister… with a black nose, long brown ears, brown coat and a long hairy tail… no I’ve not fought with her and taking revenge by describing her like this… she realy looks like that: she is my 12 yr old long haired dachshund Tiffany.
Hum Paanch… we live in a little house in Delhi where I’ve been born and brought up.

My dad: the only thing I can say about him is since I have known him, he has always been my grandpa and my mom’s his second wife.
Since they got married… dad has sported white hair… not by choice… genetically he suffers with premature greying of hair.
So ALL my friends always thought he is my grandpa.
Also there is a 10 year gap between dad and mom… so some people actually think my mom is his second wife or something!!


My mom: she is a totally lost case… she must have a hearing problem… cuz she NEVER hears things right!!!
And what she hears is … well.. SO different from what is being talked about that it is not funny!
But she is a sweetheart… she is so innocently stupidly funny!
And she is like the guys… dominating, drives a car well (yes, being a Woman she drives Very well!), drinks, used to smoke..
Not saying drinking /smoking is cool /right… just that she is just not a typical mom!
She is absolutely the coolest Mum ever!


My bro: well he is a mixed bag… I really adore him for being funny and cool.. but he is also very sarcastic and un-senti at times.
So ours is a love-hate realtionship… I love AND hate him, he pretty much HATES me!!
Yeah yeah I know he is young and a guy so he loves but does not show it etc etc… so after fighting about all this and stuff like “why cant u call me didi when I am 3 years elder to you?”, I have given up on him, and accepted him as he is!!
Which has recently become very interesting: he listens to weird music, have got 4 holes in his ears pierced, got reeeeeeeeally long hair, and is contemplating getting a tattoo done!! Most people say (and I quite agree with them) he looks like Jesus Christ!! (No offense, dear God!)
Also recently he has turned into a metrosexual, as far as his appearance is concerned!
Everyday, without fail he buffs his nails, shampoos and conditions his hair (only with Ultra Doux), applies all sorts of things on his face, lips etc!!
He takes double the time I take to get ready!!


My dog: no comments: we call her by all sorts of names: tifi, tifu , chipo, chimi, champa, chipi, tipi, tipsi, chimpu, chipu, futti etc etc.
And I have names her confusa-multiple-tiffnitias!!!
That’s her species name. You see, we don’t think she is a dog: she is as coward as a mouse, as fat as a buffalo/hippo/elephant, as dumb as a donkey..
So you see we are confused what kind of a creature she is and she has multiple animal traits!!
She is a lazy thing, lying aroung doing nothing. I would have called her a sack of potatoes, but even a sack of potatoes is more useful than her...so i refer to her as a sacj of rotten potatoes!!
Earleir she used to bark at strangers or welcome us home…
These days she growls/wags her tail lying in one corner, with eyes closed, if at all she chooses to react to anything.
Whenever we see she is not moving, we have to shake her to see if she is still alive or not!
She is also quite a big Dhabba on the Dog community… she has killed over a dozen mice but is shit scared of cats.. even kittens!!!
We are planning to get a new dog to spice up her life a bit... I knwo she is 12 and about to die... but I realy wish she lives for 3-4 years more so I can take her with me as my dahej!! ;-)



As you can make out ours is a totally crazy family: we are also totally crazy about each other!
My parents are also the MOST chilled out people I have ever seen: so much so that we can talk about anything on this earth with them. Heck I remember once we even watched uncensored Kamasutra together at home! Boy was that embarassing, yet fun!
Earlier, during my teenage, I thought I was so unlucky to be stuck with this family, but since I became 17/18, I realised how lucky I am to be with them! They make my life complete. I dunno what I would have done without them.
And seriously, given a chance to choose the ideal set of parents in my next life, I would still choose them!!

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